Joker
by Chimetals
Summary: Obligatory Disclaimer: W is not mine, etc. No pairings, and despite being around ep 40 in the timeline, the series' plot takes a backseat and spoilers are avoided. This half is done, the second half is on the way-it has a nice enough stopping point, though, so don't hesitate to read it. The theme is "Things that never happened in W".


Shotaro grimaced at the thought of what he was about to do. But as the situation was, he didn't have much of a choice—the exit was blocked, and even if he _could_ leave, the dopant this time would most definitely kill the other hostages. It would have been the usual sort of situation if he could just get ahold of Philip. It wasn't that his partner was being uncooperative this time, or even focused too much on useless topics—when Shotaro had put on the W belt, he had felt nothing. Even if Philip was _asleep_, Shotaro would feel the snap of the connection just before his partner's groggy thoughts.

The cornered detective let out his frustrations with an exasperated sigh. He most definitely did not want to do this. How long had he fought dopants? How many times had he seen what gaiamemories would do to your mind? He flinched as he remembered the group of bird users—only one of them had the connector needed to use the memory, and the others suffered horribly for using it. Despite all the things he had been through, the screams of those kids still haunted him. He made a sarcastic face at himself, _let's not forget the smell of their burning flesh where they used that memory, either_.

The sound of something breaking jolted him out of his thoughts—the dopant wasn't any less pissed than when Shotaro had taken to hiding a while ago. He was out of time. He rolled his eyes as the dopant started yelling for the Fuuto Kamen Rider to come out for what seemed the fifth time in the last twenty minutes. _Well, you aren't going to _get_ W, because _I'm_ not going get W_. Irritated, he made a face as the dopant continued yelling. _I guess I need to pick a spot_, he thought to himself. It was just going to be one time, so it shouldn't be as bad as the bird group… Hopefully. Philip had told him about those reactions—it wasn't something that built up, but something that could have happened at any point—a probability that increased with each use, but present from the first time nonetheless.

Shotaro stared at the memory in his hand—up until this point, it had been a familiar comrade. Now it seemed sinister. He took a deep breath to brace himself—_I can't believe I'm doing this_—and let it out—_anywhere but the face is fine_. He had seen people do this so many times before—he knew how it worked. It wasn't all that different from how W used the memories, in a way. He paused. W. He had left the belt on in the hope that Philip would come back and he wouldn't have to do this, but the familiar connection was still nonexistent. Should he leave the belt on, in case he lost control? Or would that risk Philip to the same mental corruption? He didn't know nearly enough about the memories to know the right choice in this situation, but… _It's just once… I don't want Philip to see this_. Shotaro resolutely removed the belt—there was no going back, now.

He stepped out from his hiding space as he hit the memory's activation button—"JOKER" it proclaimed, no differently than any other time he had used it—and in the brief moment before he pressed the memory to his forearm, he analyzed the situation. Five hostages, and one dopant who had had no idea where he was the entire time. _I bet you weren't expecting this, though_. Shotaro allowed himself a wry smirk.

Then he _felt_ it. The raw power of the memory, coursing up his arm, flooding his everything, changing the essence of his being. Suddenly the desperate behavior of dopants made sense, the way they would cling to their gaiamemories as their lives and world burned down around them, the way they lost their sense of self just for another fix. Shotaro forced himself to stop basking in this new power for a moment and _focus_ on the situation. It felt like he had been transported to another world and another situation—everything was _sharper_, and he felt like he could tell how everyone was going to move just a second before they did.

The other dopant charged him, but his attacks looked a lot slower than before. Easier to predict. No more difficult to read than a detective novel. Shotaro wondered what had given him such a problem before—he could have taken this guy blindfolded and with one arm behind his back. _No_, he corrected himself, _this is Joker's doing_. Hand-to-hand, adaptable combat. That was Joker. Was. That _was_ Joker. _This is the real Joker_. He grinned at this thought, and began his counterattack. With each strike came another rush of excitement—this was his power, this was Joker. This was _his_ fated gaiamemory, and _no one_ could stop him. The other dopant went down easily—all that was left was the memorybreak.

Shotaro froze. A memorybreak. He had never seen a dopant use one, and really, he hadn't seen any dopant-dopant battles. None that ended without someone dying, at least. And indeed, the dopant at his feet hadn't even lost his transformation. _Maybe I should keep punching him_, a stray thought whispered to Shotaro. He made a disgusted face at himself, _I didn't think the mental effects would hit this fast_. He crouched and prodded the other dopant, "How about giving up?" no response. Was he unconscious? Was that even possible while transformed? No, he was probably playing opossum. Shotaro straightened up, continuing to eye the dopant.

He could feel Joker's hold on his mind loosening a little, now that they were no longer fighting, and he finally realized the hostages were staring at him. What was that expression? It seemed so foreign. _Fear_, his sharpened world supplied his mind, _they're afraid of your power_. Despite the euphoria still washing over him, he felt something heavy settle in the middle of his gut. This wasn't what he wanted. He sighed, wishing the memory didn't make him feel so _great_. How did dopants get their memories out of their body? Shotaro wasn't entirely sure, but it was apparently simple enough that no one needed an explanation for it. It seemed stereotypical, but it was worth a shot—he focused on becoming human again, focused on the memory coming out—how Joker looked and felt in his hand, not his body.

He restlessly glanced around the room as he worked to remove the memory—it was only a moment, but it felt like an eternity of holding his hand awkwardly to his arm, ready to catch the ejected Joker. As he felt the power gathering up to leave him, he caught a brief glance of a mirror. It was a sad thing, half-shattered from the other dopant's rampage, but more than enough to reflect him in the moment he changed back. He stared at his usual face for a moment, now as alien to him as the memory in his hand.

Shotaro slowly looked at the people around him. The world still felt sharp, even though he felt dazed. There was still a dopant that needed a memorybreak, though, and he still couldn't perform one. Terui, though—Shotaro pulled up the number of his phone—Terui would have to handle this one. He didn't have the slightest clue how he was going to explain a defeated dopant despite a missing partner, but he still had to make this call. As the phone rang, he looked at the nearest hostage, a scared kid of maybe thirteen or fourteen. Shotaro tried to give him a reassuring smile, but the realization of what he had just done, and how he must seem to this kid had started to set in. Shaken, he managed a weak apologetic smile, "you're safe now—you can go home," he told them gently as he waited for the call to connect.

"You did _what_," Terui hissed. Shotaro grimaced and averted his gaze. He regretted telling the cop, but as the police would be asking the hostages for their witness accounts later, there was no point in hiding the truth—he had put on a goddamned _show_ for them, after all. "Do you understand just how much danger you put those people in?!" How Terui could yell without being any louder than normal conversation was rather impressive.  
"They were already in danger, you know. That dopant was seconds away from hurting one of them."  
"Then how do you explain him waiting around for an hour with them before you pulled your little stunt? Do you even know what you _did_ while you were like that?"

Terui was referring to the relatively passive nature with which the dopant allowed himself to have his memory broken. Shotaro had, admittedly, never seen someone act like that before, either. He couldn't really explain the behavior, either, as he remembered more of how he _felt_ during the fight and less of what _happened_.

"And what about Philip? Was he _okay_ with this?"  
"I couldn't connect to Philip!" Shotaro snapped, glaring at Terui. The latter's glare darkened, intensified. It had, "This isn't like you and you know it" written all over it. Shotaro flinched a little and backed down—his retaliation _had_ been weirdly angry.  
Terui sighed and eased up, "What are we supposed to do, now? Am I supposed to perform a memorybreak on you, too?"  
Shotaro contemplated it for a moment, ignoring the voice in his head _screaming_ that that was a bad idea and instead focused on the facts. "I think we should find Philip first, figure out what happened."  
"And you?"  
"I still need to be able to fight, if it's life or death. And I'd rather not have to get more than one memory broken," at Terui's look of absolute disbelief, he added desperately, "I'm going to avoid fighting if I can—I don't have a connector, remember? I'd rather not end up like those bird users."

The two riders headed to the only place they knew they could find Philip—the Narumi detective agency. Akiko greeted them the moment they walked in the door, "Something's wrong with Philip!"  
Shotaro closed his eyes and took a deep breath. _At least we knew that already_, he reminded himself.  
"What happened?"  
"I came to get him to help with something, and he was asleep with the W belt on—the belt disappeared later, but he didn't wake up" Akiko ushered the boys over to the bed she had put Philip in. He was peacefully asleep, with the same expression he had when he was being used as the right half of W.

Shotaro pulled out the W driver and equipped it. The twin driver appeared on Philip, but otherwise nothing happened. He didn't expect anything from it, but he still pulled out the Joker memory—and felt Terui's attention swiftly redirect from Philip to him. _Give me a break, I'm _wearing_ the freaking driver_, he thought for a second, before the urge to ram the memory into his arm rather than the useless slot crashed over him. Still not expecting anything, he pressed the memory's button a few times for good measure. His expectations did not let him down, as Philip remained completely motionless.  
"Well?" Terui asked as Shotaro removed the driver. Shotaro shook his head,  
"Same as before—I can't sense him at all."

Shotaro frowned as a stray thought wormed its way in—but no, that would have been stupid, and Philip knew better. And yet…  
"Akiko… Did Philip try to do a lookup or anything like that?"  
Akiko nodded, "He said it would be fine if he was fast about it."  
Shotaro closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and let out an exasperated sigh.  
_Stupid stupid stubborn stupid partner._  
For a guy with the intelligence of a supercomputer and the knowledge of the world, he had some of the _worst_ ideas of anyone that Shotaro had ever met, himself included. And given that he had recently decided that using a gaiamemory _directly_ was a _good idea_, that was saying something.

Shotaro glanced at his temporary partner, only to realize that Terui didn't understand what the problem was. Skipping the why and the how to get to the problem, Shotaro condensed it into one brutal sentence, "The Sonozaki family has Philip."  
"You can't be serious."  
Shotaro rolled his eyes, "yeah, because this entire afternoon has been a joke to me." Terui glared at him.  
Suspicious, Akiko chimed in behind him, "What happened this afternoon?"  
Shotaro made a drawn-out grimace, "A dopant happened, that's all." Terui snorted softly; Shotaro ignored him. Akiko didn't seem satisfied with that answer, but she had no reason to suspect him of the truth.

The trio was silent for a moment, trying to figure out the best solution to rescue Philip. Akiko spoke up, piercing the silence and her companions' thoughts, "You aren't thinking of running in there, guns blazing, are you?" Shotaro and Terui flinched—no matter what infiltration plan they had thought of, a surprise attack had seemed like their only option.  
"Wakana knows who I am, and Terui is a well-known cop, and even _you_ are known to be associated with us…"  
"Ryu can't take that many dopants on his own, Shotaro."  
"I can fight." Shotaro retaliated, then immediately regretted it when Akiko raised her eyebrows.  
"I didn't hear about this." She said accusatorily.  
Shotaro looked away and readjusted his hat, "It happened recently, is all."  
"You _aren't _fighting." Terui cut in. Shotaro scowled at him.  
"We don't have a choice!"

"Why shouldn't Shotaro fight?"

The riders froze, unsure of how to answer. Neither was entirely sure how Akiko would react, but both were sure that she would find out sooner or later. Even so, there was always the chance they could take this secret to their graves—though if they really charged into the Sonozaki mansion, that would be sooner rather than later.

Shotaro locked eyes with Terui. _Lie_, he willed at the cop, _she doesn't need to know this_. If all went well and they saved Philip, it would be an easy matter to fix Shotaro's addiction—probably. At worst, he could stand still like a good little dopant afterwards and let Terui memorybreak him. _Joker_, Shotaro corrected himself, _he could memorybreak _Joker. His strong tie to the memory caught him off guard, but wasn't unexpected.

But Terui met Shotaro's gaze unflinchingly, with eyes that read, "She deserves to know." Calm and sharp, that gaze pierced Shotaro, and he knew he wasn't going to get his way. Terui stared down the detective as he delivered the truth.  
"Shotaro used the Joker memory directly earlier—his only means of fighting right now is as a dopant."

Ashamed and childishly irritated, Shotaro looked away from Terui to Philip's body. A thought he had pushed away when he made his choice to fight earlier that day and been evading ever since crept up on him. _How will Philip react?_ No, it was better to focus on the present, not to dwell on future issues. And the present involved saving Philip, and… Akiko. Shotaro stiffened, prepared for a hellfire barrage of Akiko's wrath. When it didn't come, he hesitantly looked over at his "boss". Akiko had frozen, a slipper poised to strike. But based on her expression, she was clearly torn between whether hitting or not hitting Shotaro would be the more painful choice.

After a pause, she settled on a single swift strike. Shotaro winced from the stinging pain—she had held nothing back—but he felt somewhat better. Terui and Akiko began trying to generate an infiltration plan, but with all three of their faces known, they were stuck at square one. Shotaro tuned out their discussion in favor of his own thoughts. He took a seat on the bed. Something had been nagging at him since Terui outed him as a dopant.

The world suddenly became _sharp_ again—Shotaro couldn't tell if it was a residual effect of using the memory, or the suddenness of the realization. Dopant. _That's_ what had been bothering him. This entire time, he had been fighting the thought that he was no different than those mental wrecks he'd been stopping on a regular basis. He hadn't been thinking of himself as a dopant—he had been thinking of himself as a rider. But currently, he was the former, not the latter, and—

"This might work."

Terui whirled to give him a look for horror. It took a second before Shotaro remembered the two had been discussing an elaborate crossdressing plan that neither fighter would ever live down. Shotaro waved their idea away. "Not _that_. I'll go in and distract the Sonozaki family while you recover Philip." His friends' expressions changed to incredulous disbelief, and Shotaro realized they were most definitely not on the same page as him.

"Look," He started to explain. He hesitated for a second—he didn't like the word, and he didn't want to say it, but it was best to put this bluntly. "Right now, I'm a dopant, right?" his friends seemed uneasy with the word as well. _So it isn't just me_. But now was no time to avoid the elephant in the room—or in this case, the dopant in the room. "I'll go in, and play up that angle. Try to talk them into giving me a connector." Terui looked like he was either going to have an aneurysm or strangle the detective, but Akiko was clearly thinking about combat ability.

"Do you really think they'll just give you one?"  
Shotaro snorted, "There's no way in hell they will. Famous detective and rider like me? If they try, then they either have something up their sleeve, or my acting is just that good."  
His response helped Terui recover enough to contribute, "And if they try to attack you?"**  
**Shotaro fought to hide a grimace. _You weren't supposed to ask that_.  
"Run?" He shrugged, "Either way, they'll be distracted." Terui didn't seem satisfied with his answer, but he knew Shotaro understood the risks.  
"And Philip? You think his mind is just tucked away somewhere in a jar?" Shotaro frowned—he was pretty sure that wasn't physically possible, and based on how Philip had described the situation to him…  
"Wakana probably has him, actually."

Terui crossed his arms and gave Shotaro a look, his opinion of dealing with possibly the strongest dopant in the Sonozaki house written across his skeptically raised eyebrows. Shotaro returned a look and continued, his mind working through their options as he spoke.

"I don't think we need to beat her, just distract her. She and Philip are connected to the gaia library, and if she really did pull his consciousness into her mind, the only reason he hasn't returned already is because she's actively keeping him from doing so. I don't think Philip would just give in and be a good little captive—if we force her to pay more attention to us, it would give Philip a chance to slip away."

The plan seemed logical enough, and with no better ideas, they began to hack out the details.

The hardest part of the plan was not rushing into the Sonozaki mansion. They didn't know how much time they had to save Philip, but they needed a minimum amount of info to avoid getting killed. Using every means they had at their disposal, bribing, cajoling, and interrogating, they managed to find a member of the servants that would talk. Personal schedules, eating times, and servant locations throughout the day were among the information they extracted from her. Among this info was the knowledge that Saeko had been missing from the mansion for several days, however, no one spoke of it, and no one expected her back. Their informant didn't know why or what happened, but that knowledge meant nothing to them anyway, so long as her return wasn't soon. Moreover, Wakana had been rather secluded the days Philip had been missing, which confirmed Shotaro's theory about distracting her from Philip.

The entire process of getting the information needed and setting up a plan took only a few days, but they were the worst for Shotaro. Early on, he had noticed the voice in his head that had great bad ideas involving the Joker memory. It had been fairly quiet initially, but as the days progressed, its solution to his every problem was using the Joker memory. It wanted to apply this solution to everything ranging from saving Philip to getting dressed in the morning, regardless of how nonsensical that might be. He had finally come to understand why dopants attacked so frequently, despite making it easy to discover their user—the withdrawal was awful, and it only got worse with each day.

It also didn't help that he felt Terui was breathing down his neck all the time. Logically, Shotaro knew that Terui had actually backed off and given him more trust in the matter—but that didn't change his perception of the situation. His appetite had gotten progressively worse the last few days, and he had been forcing himself to eat, even though everything tasted flavorless to him. Sleep, likewise, was now a rare commodity, though he felt so keyed up and generally twitchy that he wasn't sure he needed it anymore. His friends attributed it to the Philip situation, but comparatively, the rescue mission was under control. They had decided to act earlier than they initially planned because of his deteriorating health, though, something Shotaro was grateful for.

The plan was for Shotaro to enter the mansion and distract Ryubee with his dopant act while Terui found and initiated a fight with Wakana, or executed any other distractions he thought of on route. Akiko would monitor Philip, and call if he woke up to signal the retreat. As he said before, Shotaro thought his odds of actually getting a connector from Ryubee were slim to none, but a small part of him—the definitively dopant part—still hoped for it. Combat would be a satisfactory alternative—maybe the withdrawal afterwards would be even _worse_, but the detective was more hung up on the now than the later—and if Ryubee offed him, well… _At least it would put me out of my misery_, he thought dryly.

Shotaro's phone rang—Terui's call to let Shotaro know his infiltration into the servants was successful. As their contact was a girl, and their only costume from the mansion was Akiko's maid outfit, Terui had been forced to crossdress. Akiko had done a wonderful job with him, though all the makeup in the world couldn't spare his ego. Shotaro wasn't going to escape this unscathed, either—his pride-swallowing, miserable dopant begging would be completely audible to Terui—they were both wearing wires, and would remain in communication through this initial phone call, ready to come to the other's aid if the mission went sour.

They had come to the silent agreement that whatever happened in the Sonozaki mansion would remain in the Sonozaki mansion.

Shotaro answered his phone and connected it to his earpiece before sliding it into his pocket. As he crossed the street to the mansion gates, he hoped his condition would lend credibility to his plea—despite what he had told Terui and Akiko, he wasn't all that great at acting. On the other hand, what he was about to say had probably been his real feelings for the last twenty-four hours. That thought sickened him, but it didn't make it any less true. This was a mission to rescue Philip, but as far as his interaction with Ryubee Sonozaki was concerned, his mission was to get a connector.

The worst part of the outfit wasn't the skirt. It wasn't the makeup, the wig, or even the tights.

It was the shoes.

Akiko had scoffed when he called them high heels, but that didn't make him feel like he was going to break his ankles any less. Terui kept his head down not to hide his face, but to make sure there weren't any unexpected hazards on the floor that he might trip on. The mansion was bigger than he remembered it, but that might have been due to the tiny steps he was taking so he wouldn't fall. At this point, Terui would take _any_ excuse to transform into Accel—even if it was Shotaro rampaging as a dopant—just so he could _move_ again.

And Shotaro—what was all that about _acting_? The guy was just telling Ryubee everything other than them knowing the cause of Philip's condition and the rescue mission. Then again, anything other than the truth about how Fuuto's precious Kamen rider became a dopant would be unbelievable. Laughter came in over the earpiece, and Terui wrinkled his nose in disgust. _You're chatting it up with the most dangerous guy in Fuuto, and I'm stuck in _these shoes.

Terui heard footsteps and risked a glance to check their owner's identity—it was their informant maid. Relief flooded over him—she could tell him how to get to Wakana's room, and he wouldn't have to walk any more than he needed to. Taking advantage of the empty hall, he flagged her down for the directions he needed. It took a moment for her to recognize him, but when she did, her face cycled rapidly though shock, a quick evaluation of his appearance, and mild disgust. Apparently Akiko's makeup job made him unrecognizable, not attractive.

Terui hobbled to Wakana's room as quickly as he could manage. He hadn't come up with any other plans besides fighting her, unfortunately, as the idea of waltzing in to a powerful dopant's room to proclaim battle seemed not only insane, but somewhat…craven. All of Shotaro's talking was giving him an idea though—Wakana had been shut up mostly in her room, according to their informant, so Philip _must_ be giving her problems. If Terui could engage her in any way, even verbal, it might be enough to complete the mission. _Actually, I might not have to say anything at all, dressed like this_. He smiled dryly to himself before quietly pushing Wakana's door open.

The radio idol was sitting on her bed, an open book in her lap. She looked up when the door opened, a blank expression on her face. She seemed to recognize him after a brief moment, and a gentle smile spread across her face. She cocked her head as she gave him a slow nod—_It couldn't be_, he thought in shock.  
"Terui Ryu" she said, two of her perfectly manicured nails resting on her chin. The glint of excitement in her eyes was unmistakable, not to mention that particular way of addressing him-  
"Philip." He whispered. Philip-Wakana beamed.  
"It's a compelling situation, isn't it?"

_"Compelling situation"_. Terui's initial shock began to edge toward infuriation. _If you're sitting here _reading_, why didn't you escape already?!_ He wanted to scream, but was interrupted by Philip's radiant smile being abruptly replaced by Wakana's scowl.

"So that's what Philip meant." He muttered. Wakana had indeed taken Philip, his mind was in her body, as expected, but the ease with which she took control back suggested that control over her body had been allowed for the sake of placating him. Philip wasn't thrilled about being in the situation—hopefully—he was just distracted momentarily by the implications of it, and the possible effects, while waiting for the rescue squad. Hopefully. Terui would be sure to extract an explanation from him as soon as they were done here.

Still frowning, Wakana stood, withdrawing her personal gaiamemory. Terui cursed his outfit—if he could move a little better, he might have been able to step in and kick it out of her hand. That wouldn't be a problem for much longer, though—he lifted his skirt to reach the Accel driver and engine blade strapped to his legs. The thought occurred to him how ridiculous he must look, but the rush of battle and the ability to discard these _shoes_ blocked any truly bitter thoughts, and he allowed himself a wry smile before he began the transformation.

He'd never admit it to anyone, but it always surprised him a little, when the belt suddenly tightened around his waist and pressed the heavy driver into his gut. It felt a little like a punch to the stomach, until the familiar warmth radiated outward—it was both relaxing and an adrenaline rush, culminating in the short-lived speedometer lines that collapsed back to create his rider form. It wasn't that he only felt alive when he used the gaiamemory, but as Accel he was _more_ alive.

And he was ready for a fight.

Shotaro heard the gaiamemories' calls over his earpiece only seconds before he heard the crash come from the hall. He put on his best surprised face and hoped Ryubee wouldn't want to "test his loyalty". Ryubee paid the noises absolutely no notice—what kind of household was he even used to? It was only him and his daughter, so who would even be making that kind of noise on such a regular basis?

Ryubee continued with their conversation, and Shotaro followed suit. None of the goals he had walked in with had been accomplished so far, after all. But even with the mindless chatter and the sounds of fighting in his ear, his mind had set off on a particularly _sharp_ thought process about Ryubee's reaction to the fighting noises.

Philip was probably the cause of it—if he could somehow control Wakana's body, even if only briefly, then he would have a distraction tactic—Wakana could fight him for her body, or prevent him from accessing the library and escaping. While neither one could do both at the same time, if he switched between the two often or fast enough, Philip could theoretically return. Alone, he had only a small chance, but with Terui forcing Wakana to keep her mind in the physical world, their rescue plan would most likely work.

Terui quickly realized that this battle was not going how he had expected. Firstly, Wakana had not tried to use her Xtreme form. Whether she was avoiding opening a Gaia connection—another opening for Philip to slip through—or whether this was due to Philip's mental influence, Terui couldn't be sure. Terui did know, however, that Philip was interfering with the battle, and Wakana was thoroughly distracted by him.

Her initial charge had succeeded at tackling Terui into the wall, but she had leapt back suddenly, and given him an almost playful look over her shoulder. The initial switch between the two Sonozakis had caught him off guard, and he only barely dodged Wakana's second attack. Philip's mental attacks became less jarring afterwards, but it was still strange to watch an opponent reel away suddenly to move nonsensically before resuming their attack.

It slowly dawned on Terui that he would probably know when Philip returned before even Akiko. Unfortunately, that just meant the battle would quickly deteriorate without Philip's extra help. The thought of using Trial to leave his remaining dignity and escape crossed his mind—after all, if his transformation was forcibly broken now, his clothing wouldn't even afford him the ability to run, let alone fight.

Terui inserted the Engine memory into his weapon and felt the resulting energy travel up his arm—any damage he caused now only increased his odds of an unscathed success, both in the rescue and the retreat parts of the mission. He charged, not caring if the person in control was Philip or Wakana, and attacked with the ferocity he used before a memorybreak.

Shotaro wasn't entirely sure what to do when his phone rang for the second time that day. He had wound up relocating to another room in the mansion with Ryubee—much to their advantage, as his earpiece told him that Terui was blatantly using Engine with no regard for stealth. Granted, Shotaro was the only one of the two that knew Ryubee had remained nonchalant when sounds of fighting started, but they didn't know if any of the servants were dopants, or if there was a hidden guard somewhere.

Regardless, his mission was complete, so he tactfully excused himself from Ryubee's presence to see himself out of the mansion. That was the impression with which he left Ryubee, at least. From the main hall, he easily followed the raucous combat sounds to the ongoing Wakana-Terui fight. That Terui needed help was obvious, and it wouldn't be long before Wakana tried to access her Xtreme form. Focusing on what needed to be done in the nearby battle, Shotaro pulled the W driver and Joker memory out. Pushing aside the "better" idea to drive the Joker memory into his arm where it belonged, Shotaro pressed the driver to his waist.

The moment the driver connected, he could feel Philip's mind snap into place—alert, perceptive, curious—and the knowledge of the battle Shotaro had only listened to flooded his mind. The Cyclone memory appeared in the right driver slot, and as he finished its insertion, Philip's consciousness transferred fully and the world got clearer—it wasn't the same _sharpness_ as Joker, but more like an increase in widespread input—in that moment, Shotaro knew how many tiles were on the ceiling, the exact shade of the carpet—useless things that drove their way into his enhanced memory nonetheless. As always, he wondered for a brief moment if that was how Philip saw the world, and as always, his partner responded with a brief twitch of interested uncertainty.

Then Shotaro inserted his Joker memory. He had only used it directly once, but he had already forgotten what it was like as part of W. He felt it _sharpen_ the world slightly—it wasn't as satisfying this way—pushing aside the useless details and focusing Philip's whirlwind of a thought process on the enemy. Able to separate the memories' effects now, Shotaro had a brief flash of understanding of Philip's memories.

When they had first formed W, they had experimented with Philip inserting different memories and learned that only three could transfer his consciousness. At the time, neither half of W understood why, but with his residual memory of Joker's direct use, Shotaro knew the answer now. All three were part of Philip's mind; Cyclone was his constant whirlwind of thoughts, unbridled and directionless; Luna was his creativity, nonsensical and versatile; Heat was his cruelty—more subdued now, but still effective when he wanted to apply it. That's why he needed Shotaro to fight with him—Joker to focus his thoughts, Trigger to set a target for his problem-solving, and Metal to protect him from himself.

The answer seeming so simple, Shotaro allowed himself a smile. He felt Philip prod his memories for the source of this enlightenment. _I'll tell you later_, he thought to the both of them and redirected Philip's focus to the battle at hand.

Calling the resulting scramble a battle, though, was an exaggeration composed entirely of pride—Terui had taken one too many physical hits and Shotaro was still mentally unstable. W's charge lasted just long enough for Accel to escape from under Wakana, all the while the mental tactics Philip used against Wakana flashed through Shotaro's mind. _This is a good time to try to access the gaia library—now would be a good time to take control of her body_. Shotaro deftly wrapped up his mild frustration at the constant distractions and sent it back at his partner as he wrestled with one of Wakana's assaults. _Focus, Philip, you aren't doing that anymore_. Shotaro felt his partner's consciousness shift, change gears, and murmur a gentle wave of emotion that equated to, "whoops", before re-evaluating their tactics anew.

The new "tactics" were mostly escape routes and means to avoid Wakana's attacks. Philip snagged Shotaro's thoughts repeatedly and without warning—something the detective was thoroughly used to by this point—redirecting his attention to specific hallways, tells in Wakana's movement that let him know where her attack would land, Terui's position and status, and anything else Philip felt warranted attention. That was their way of interacting—Philip let his thoughts go where they would, running rampant in his partner's mind and pulling Shotaro along when he needed to, rarely focusing enough to form a full sentence—and Shotaro guiding him when he got too sidetracked by irrelevant details. Really, Shotaro let himself bask in the feeling—he didn't need to think, and Philip didn't need to focus—it was the perfect balance.

It wasn't until they were safely to the building they had stashed Terui's spare clothes that the riders stopped to think about what they had just done. Shotaro felt Philip smile just before he ended the transformation—_it's good to have you back, _he thought in response. He felt Philip's curiosity perk back up—his partner had remembered Shotaro's revelation about their memories and W. Guilt buried itself like a punch in Shotaro's gut, but Philip naggingly prodded him with the reminder that Terui was still changing clothes and cleaning off his face. Shotaro's thoughts quieted for a moment, one hand on the W driver. Philip waited patiently, but now a little worried—Shotaro sighed as he reminded himself that the emotional wavelength went both ways.

Shotaro tried to gather his thoughts about what had happened to him a few days ago—no, not what _happened_ to him, but what he had actively _done_. After a few failed attempts at gathering thoughts so messy that Philip didn't immediately begin picking them apart, Shotaro forced himself to relive the memories, bracing himself for his partner's reactions so he wouldn't stop midway.

Philip watched the memories quietly, for the most part—the moment Shotaro decided to use the memory was met with a wave of horror that made him recoil hard enough that Philip followed it with an apology ripple. Shotaro tried to ignore the swirling tumult of revulsion, disbelief, and—heartbreak was the best way to describe it—a chaotic vortex that Philip tried to hide under a glass-smooth surface. Shotaro stopped the memory playback, boxing them up and putting them where he wouldn't think of them carelessly, either. They spent the remaining time waiting for Terui without so much as a mental brush; the other's presence was enough for each of them. As unbalanced as they were, feeling their other half settle their emotions reassured them of the situation more than any amount of time alone. By the time Terui was through changing and Shotaro removed the W driver, both W riders could say that the situation was under control and on the mend.

A week after they had rescued Philip, Terui called Shotaro out to a local café. The official reason was for lunch, but the truth was that Terui wanted to check up on Shotaro's situation—he was still in possession of his unbroken memory, and while Philip had reassured them that the use of W would act as a substitute to break his addiction, Terui still wanted to verify Shotaro's dopant status personally. They both complained about their work for a while before Terui decided to bring it up.  
"How's your arm, by the way?"  
Shotaro waved him off, "It's fine, don't worry about it."  
"We don't know what happens to connector-less users that stop before they get injured." Terui eyed Shotaro skeptically over his coffee, and got an annoyed face in return.  
Shotaro rolled up his sleeve and smugly held his arm out for Terui. "You can't even tell where it was. I'm fine."  
Terui relaxed, and the tension he had been building up since he found out Shotaro had become a dopant finally dissipated. A faint smile tugged at his mouth and he took a sip of his coffee.

No longer being antagonized, Shotaro relaxed as well, smiling absentmindedly as he watched the waiters move about the tables. He picked out things to focus on in turn, savoring the feeling of its every detail rushing into his mind at once. Terui's doubt had been expected, but did he really think Shotaro would show him his arm if he had used Joker again? Shotaro's arm had swollen at the site for several days, like a badly infected invisible wound—at some point, Shotaro had been convinced his body was trying to _grow_ a connector. The swelling didn't subside until a couple days after Philip's rescue, either. If he was being honest with himself, Shotaro had to admit that he wasn't initially thrilled with the results of the rescue—not completely, at least. He was glad to have his partner back, but he disliked not being able to use the Joker memory as he wanted. Then again, as the situation with Terui had demonstrated, having his connector on his chest had its advantages.


End file.
